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  #141 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2008, 08:07 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trularin View Post
So am I reading this correctly, the "Bundy Rum" is not good and the "xxxx beer" is okay?

That make sense.
Neither of them are any good trularin - since you're a long way away I'm sure you'll appreciate a cultural background briefing on Queensland where XXXX and Bundy are the two most popular drinks...

- The XXXX brewery was founded in about 1923 in the southern state of Victoria - the birthplace of all great beers - which was unfortunate for XXXX because it had to compete with them.
In 1924 production was moved to the northern state of Queensland where there was way too much sun and not much clean drinking water, naturally the Queenslanders were delighted with the new arrival of XXXX because a) they could finally spell beer and b) it tasted (marginally) better than an stagnant swamp water .
Consequently it has been a firm favorite ever since.

- Bundy Rum is a sickly sweet sugar cane by-product most often mixed with Coke and consumed by mullet wearing 'nancy boys' who cant drink beer (although if its XXXX....) and who's vocabulary is limited to 'Woooooooo' and who have only the wheel-craft to drive their Ute in circles on dirt (known as circlework) - frequently until it explodes.


wb ute

An anthropological examination of this sub-culture has been provided on You-Tube by 'BundyRumChic' if you care to look her up

-example of circlework-


(don't make eye contact)

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  #142 (permalink)  
Old 10-17-2008, 11:45 AM
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That is a serious front grill!

Wow!

Okay, we will not be drinking any of those soon.


Last edited by trularin; 10-17-2008 at 11:47 AM..
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  #143 (permalink)  
Old 10-19-2008, 01:06 AM
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Trularin,

Mmmm to put into into perspective...

Picture bib and brace overalls. South of the Mason Dixon line......
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  #144 (permalink)  
Old 10-19-2008, 01:28 AM
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Besides where alse are you gonna get a 253 to do circle work?
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  #145 (permalink)  
Old 10-19-2008, 04:12 AM
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trularin, firstly you must understand that the further south from the Queensland border you go the less believable are the residents. They are a mislead mob prone to making gross rash statements. You might note that Mr. LoBelly hails from Victoria and that's wayyyyyy down south.

BMK used the words "south" and "bib and brace overalls" and those terms clearly describe the Victorian folk.

You'll note the over-engineered bull bar on the front of the blue ute. It is a Victorian registered ute. The reason for the heavy bar is that in the city any motorist turning right from a dual lane road must do so only from the left lane. So the bar helps in "moving aside" those motorists in the lane next to you.

It is also handy for protecting the ute from all those passengers who disembark from their trams right into the path of on-comming traffic.

Now, to give you the good oil on Bundy Rum and XXXX. Mr. LoBelly is correct in saying the Bundy is derived from the locally grown sugar cane. However it is a smooth full bodied rum that is, not only appreciated by Rum connoisseurs but also has proven medical properties. During the war diggers on the Kokoda trail used it as a repellant against malaria carrying mosquitos. It was also excellent to pour over their feet as a treatment for althletes foot. Surgeons used it in the operating theatre, not only as a anesthetic but also as an excellent anticeptic.

Of more modern times it is, as Mr. LoBelly said, sometimes mixed with coke but only to dilute the effects of the stuff. If it is taken straight with maybe the odd block of ice, then Victorian ladies tend to appear more attractive after no more than 2 glasses. Taken with coke the effects take a little longer to eventuate which gives the NSW ladies half a chance. Should it not be for Bundy Rum the "ladies" of Victoria and NSW would remain spinsters.

Now to XXXX, the nectar of the gods. Again Mr. LoBody has stretched the truth. Indeed it was moved from Victoria after 12 months but only because of the before mentioned condition of their rivers. An essential ingredient of a good beer is clean water. How do you draw water from mud?.

What the Victorians have done to supplement their shortage of water for brewing is to round up all the stray cats. They then train these cats to sit on those little bottles on the production line. What spills is then put into aluminium cans.

So there it is Trularin, believe who you want but before you believe any story told by an Australian I suggest you check from what State that person originates.
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  #146 (permalink)  
Old 10-19-2008, 05:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rebel1 View Post
...The reason for the heavy bar is that in the city any motorist turning right from a dual lane road must do so only from the left lane...
...wouldn't be any fun driving in the city if it was easy...

very good Rebel - you actually made me laugh out loud
- especially when you put 'nectar of the gods' in the same hemisphere as XXXX.

Speaking of hemispheres - I'm sure Mr Trularin perceives the relative locale of the deep south in the northern hemisphere and the north of Australia here in the southern hemisphere...

And as to your assertion about the stray cats, any student of history can tell you that in the mid 1800's there was a gold rush in Victoria accompanied by a large influx of Chinese immigration. QED



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  #147 (permalink)  
Old 10-19-2008, 06:29 AM
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Mr LoBelly esquire Sir,

As you imply I have not studied the history of Victoria. I have no excuse than to advise I am the progeny of some poor soul who came across in the first fleet.

So it is that my great great great great past criminal relative upon release from detention ventured North seeking land of fortune. As a youngster I often wondered why he choose to come north rather than south. It was not until I researched my family tree that I found the criminal who founded our family name had been jailed for larceny in the mother country.

Now, you have to admit, that the crime of larceny is a crime of intelligence. He was not just some petty thief who stole loafs of bread, he was a smart thief. A man of intelligence. So it was natural for him to come north.

So it is that he found his way to Queensland and lived to a ripe old age and never again did any wrongs against society. Queensland to this day remains a prosperous state, The state still owns some utilities, a transport system, has $hitloads of black gold still in the ground, and enjoys an excellent standard of living and sees it's fair share of sunshine. XXXX beer is brewed here and worshiped as the nectar of the gods. In fact I'm told by some who practice religion more actively than I that many churches would prefer to provide XXXX for communal that the watery wine they are currently forced to sip and which is sourced from parts south.

Now...my first wife's criminal relative didn't come north. He went south. He was just a common thief of unknown crime but we are sure it was something as simple as raping and pillaging. We believe he eventually lifted his stature in life and became a politician.

Anyways, the purpose of this brief history lesson is to acknowledge that not much has changed in Victoria since then. I suppose my wife's past criminal relative was quite active in propagating the population of Victoria as the politicians still rape and pillage the public purse, the state owns nothing of any value, they're running out of water, and the local breweries still produce a product closely resembling cats pi$$..

I'm sure if Mr Trularin would care to google victoria he will find what I say is indeed the truth.
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Last edited by Rebel1; 10-19-2008 at 07:11 AM..
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  #148 (permalink)  
Old 10-19-2008, 12:58 PM
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As always said never let the truth get the way of a good story!
I seem to remember some famous poly called JO was a bit sus.
his wife, so the story goes made pumpkin scones using VB(beer)
in the mix.
Barry Nelson.
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  #149 (permalink)  
Old 10-19-2008, 04:07 PM
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Ahhh Mr. Nelson, good to hear from you and I hope this finds you well.

You are correct, The lady to whom you refer was one called Flo, and she was married to the Premier of Queensland, a bloke called Joe. This Joe, prior to becoming Premier, was a man from the land and earned his keep growing peanuts and pumpkins. Flo his wife was famous for her culinary skills but more so for her pumpkin scones. Now it is fact that Flo did say publicly that it was the VB which was the secret ingredient.

Anyways, one of Joe's ministers was a huge bloke named Russ Hinze and he and Joe became great mates. Russ was fondly referred to as the minister for everything because nothing happened in Queensland without Russ giving it his blessing. Russ was a publican and had made his fortune running a house of ill repute located midway between Brisbane and the Gold Coast.

So unlucky was this poor Russ that when a multi lane freeway was constructed from Brisbane to the gold coast a mistake was made as to the route of the freeway and it ended up passing right through a section of Russ's property, namely his drive thru bottle shop.

To make a long story short, Russ used to sell some southern beers, particularly one called Victorian Bitter. The local drinkers didn't take to this beer and simply referred to it as VB, which some say was short for very bad and by others as vile brew.

Anyways in an effort to get rid of the growing mountain of unsaleable VB stock, Russ convinced Flo to incorporate it into her recipe for pumpkin scones.

Now, with the benefit of time we now know that Flo didn't incorporate it into the recipe for scones but rather just poured the stuff over the fields of growing pumpkin as a fertilizer.

So like most utterings by those Victorians, the devil is in the detail.
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Last edited by Rebel1; 10-19-2008 at 07:28 PM..
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  #150 (permalink)  
Old 10-20-2008, 02:15 PM
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Trularin

Those in bib and brace overalls and pick ups with big bull bars wandered down south from the cane fields of Queensland.

Just remember the hemispheres turn it all around. Know you get the picture. It's hotter up north in this hemisphere -

The southerners here are up in the north in hot wet areas of Queensland...
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  #151 (permalink)  
Old 10-20-2008, 04:19 PM
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My worst fears were realised many years ago when we had a brewery strike in Victoria. Businesses desperate for a sale were bringin" truck loads of that XXXX stuff into the state. Thank god the brewery workers came to their senses. I don't know how the cane toads can pass off muddy water as beer! I think that strike was when I got a liking for wine. There was one beer and only one that I can recall that was worse than xxxx. Yep you guessed it "Courage" luckily it didn't last too long. And as for Bundy we all know that it is only one step away from being metho.
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  #152 (permalink)  
Old 10-20-2008, 07:32 PM
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Ahhhhh, I can remember when every brewery in Oz was closed by union actions.

No Oz made beer at all....very sad times.

To fill the drought some-one started importing shiploads of a beer not unlike VB in taste called South Pacific or SP for short.

Consequently it was referred to as Swamp Pi$$.
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Last edited by Rebel1; 10-22-2008 at 05:12 AM..
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  #153 (permalink)  
Old 10-31-2008, 02:34 AM
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hey rebel, i just sat down with a bundy and coke and read your threads, what a laugh, youre pretty close to the mark and the futher north you get those bullbars become more common. big bullbars and bundy stickers are pretty common up here. that ute looks pretty tame compared to some of the ones getting around up here. regards tomcat
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  #154 (permalink)  
Old 10-31-2008, 03:16 AM
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Tomcat, It's an obvious fact those youngsters down south have not sampled a proper rum like Bundy and also seem to have bu$$a all taste when it comes to a good beer.

Sadly I think the VB they digest affects their cognitive abilities. Poor misguided souls constantly think the center of the cobra world rotates around Melbourne, when in reality it is here in good ole Queensland where it all happens.

Yeah, I agree with you, that bullbar looks pretty tame. I've seen some petite Queensland lasses at B&S balls drive bigger badder rigs.

Keep up the good work in central Queensland.
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Old 10-31-2008, 04:40 AM
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rebel, imagine grafting one of those bullbars onto the front of a cobra, now there would be a sight to behold and would turn some heads, id love to do it just for a joke.

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  #156 (permalink)  
Old 10-31-2008, 09:35 AM
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Okay, I went to a convention down town and met a couple of Aussies who told me that XXXX beer I had asked about was Dingo Pi$$.

It seems that beer has a bad rep.

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Old 10-31-2008, 04:18 PM
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Trularin

You are learning far to much about us..

OK what is the tip for the election - Mmmm should I discuss Politics...
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  #158 (permalink)  
Old 11-01-2008, 06:58 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trularin View Post
Okay, I went to a convention down town and met a couple of Aussies who told me that XXXX beer I had asked about was Dingo Pi$$.

It seems that beer has a bad rep.

trularin, some-one is having a lend of you. You've been got at by a couple of Aussies having some fun at your expense.

In Aussieland dingo pi$$ is a highly valued commodity ..... It all came about way back in the dreamtime.

Indigenous Australians (Aboriginals) used to wander around the dry arid interior of Australia in tribes. They would essentially travel from water hole to water hole .... stay a while .... live off the land ... then move on.

They also had a want to pass their experiences and history from generation to generation and the way they did this was by painting on cliff and cave walls in the hills and rocky outcrops.

Some of these paintings are hundreds of years old and are clearly legible today. But consider this ... all this painting was going on way before the invention of paint.

So like the American indian these Aboriginals would mix their paints from clay, ochre, and different colored minerals they dug from the ground and mixed with water. However, there was always a question that baffled scientific study.

That question was what caused these simple paints to last hundreds of years. Modern paints don't last this long without major fade and weathering. Furthermore, these paintings were mostly found miles from any water holes and in locations where it would have been very difficult to carry water.

Now I'm gonna let you into the secret .... dingo pi$$.

Seems every tribe had made pets of a couple of dingos and these wild dogs would accompany the tribe on it's wanderings around Australia and these same dogs would follow the tribe elders on their painting expeditions into the hills.

So the tribe elder would just wait till his dingos did a wee and used that to mix his paints. Simple really and like much of aussie indigenous people, quite ingenious.

Science has since found that Dingo Pi$$ contains some very rare compounds. There are reasons for this but explanation would make this post a little long so we'll leave that till some other time.

So it is that dingo pi$$ is highly sought and valued and there's nowhere near as many dingos around these days so it just gets more difficult to find.

Hense, these Aussies you met in a bar were telling you the truth it was just your lack of aussie culture which led you to mis-understand their explanation.

Therefore saying a top class ale like XXXX is like dingo Pi$$ is like saying it is liquid gold ....a good drop.
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  #159 (permalink)  
Old 11-01-2008, 02:48 PM
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Rebel1

.....
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Old 11-01-2008, 03:55 PM
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Oh, I thought it was because XXXX Beer was just about the worse beer there was...like wild dog urine.

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