Scott, I think you have started on the right path...find out how deep the water is FIRST before diving in. From my perspective, I just could not have taken the hard ass approach with Dad. I would have regretted it for the rest of my life. I think since she had POA, his best hope is bankruptcy, and that will cost 2-3 k now. I certainly don't know the situation other than what you described, but did she have kids or relatives she was sending the loot to? It is a long shot, but maybe a sincere letter to them may dredge up ONE honest one that would return SOMETHING of what she stole.
As for your dad, maybe another perspective...sometimes when my father was the most obnoxious he was really pissed at himself for making a mistake and had nobody else to take it out on but the kid trying his best to help. Is that possible here? Reality can be a bitc* when you wake up from a dream to a real-life nightmare.....
Keep on strokin', man, you're doing well!
