Having just lost my wife to breast cancer 2 months ago, I can understand your feelings. Not sure about your wife, but I found that it isn't uncommon for many spouses( both) to vacate when something like this arises. Keep a positive attitude.
Just a word of advice, especially since you live in New York, STAY AWAY from anyone promising more than they can deliver. There are many people waiting to bleed you dry with unsubstantiated promises. In particular BE VERY AFRAID of an individual in NYC by the name of "Dr.Gonzales", he nearly killed my wife last year with his witchcraft and was so arrogant about his "treatment" that every time she was having issues, he calmly told her that it was a good sign that his "treatment" was working. Yeah, it worked her from stage 3 to stage 4 within months. I'm not, nor have ever been a fan of chemo, but she rebounded enormously after leaving his abusive regimen and beginning chemo. It was too late for her, but don't let your desire to cure your illness allow you to be persuaded to do something that makes no sense. He had her on over 200 pills a day, plus a bunch of other crap..but no food to speak of. He was trumpeted by Suzanne Somers on national news while hyping her new book, although she personally didn't have his treatments. She was basing her "knowledge" on interviewing his "successes", of course, she couldn't interview his non successes for obvious reasons.
Sorry for the tirade, but people like that should be boiled in
oil and then quenched in water.
Take Care of yourself and use the sense that God gave you and has carried you this far.
Best of luck to you.