Not Ranked
The phone rings, and the wife answers.
A pervert, with heavy breathing, says;
"I bet you have a tight as$hole with no hair."
Woman replies, "Yes, he's watching TV;
who shall I say is calling?"
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Usually I wake up grumpy.
On Saturdays I let her sleep in.
_____
I still remember the words I said to my wife the day we became engaged.
I fell to my knees and said, 'I thought you were on the f___ing pill!'
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