[bonyhadi]

List of Top 10 Caddy Comments:

#10 Golfer: "Think I'm going to drown myself in the lake."
Caddy: "Think you can keep your head down that long?"

#9 Golfer: "I'd move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course."
Caddy: "Try heaven, you've already moved most of the earth."

#8 Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?"
Caddy: "Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now."

#7 Golfer: "Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?"
Caddy: "Eventually."

#6 Golfer: "You've got to be the worst caddy in the world."
Caddy: "I don't think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence."

#5 Golfer: "Please stop checking your watch all the time.
It's too much of a distraction."
Caddy: "It's not a watch - it's a compass."

#4 Golfer: "How do you like my game?"
Caddy: "Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf."

#3 Golfer: "Do you think it's a sin to play on Sunday?"
Caddy: "The way you play, sir, it's a sin on any day."

#2 Golfer: "This is the worst course I've ever played on."
Caddy: "This isn't the golf course. We left that an hour ago."

. . And the #1 best caddy comment:
Golfer: "That can't be my ball, it's too old."
Caddy: "It's been a long time since we teed off, sir."













35 Facts you were perfectly happy not knowing
(Comments are my own).

1. Rubberbands last longer when refrigerated.
(cold rubbers, what a concept)

2. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

3. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.
(not including stealing it, see IRS)

4. The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.
(worse when you masturbate?)

5. The shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.
(gets ya confused and takes ya anyways?, heh heh, wink wink, bite)

6. There are more chickens than people in the world.
(does this include the human chickens or was it human sheep?)

7. Two-thirds of the world's eggplant is grown in New Jersey.
(talk about toxic waste?)

8. The longest one-syllable word in the English language is
"screeched."

9. On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the
Parliament building is an American flag.
(it was in the US consitution original that if Canada wanted to join the
union, it could automatically without the normal concent of the people).

10. All of the clocks in the movie "Pulp Fiction" are stuck
on 4:20. (fahrenhei 451, or is it to do with 420 a way to say
Pot/marijuana or hemp)?

11. No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange,
silver or purple.
(poirrage?)

12. "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters
"mt".

13. All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln
Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.
(big head? or just large ego)

14. Almonds are a member of the peach family.
(aint that peachy)

15. Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.
(explains his love of cigars, and booze)

16. Maine is the only US state whose name is just one syllable.
(atleast one dipthong though)

17. There are only four words in the English language which end
in "dous" - tremendous, horrendous, stupendous and hazardous.
(and that a good dous?)

18. Los Angeles' full name is "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la
Reina de los Angeles de Porciuncula"

19. A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

20. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(grin, explains alot)

21. Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.

22. In most advertisements, the time displayed on a watch is 10:10

23. Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

24. The Sesame Street characters Bert and Ernie were named after
Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's "It's A
Wonderful Life." (wasn't it a porn or R rated movie?)

25. A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

26. A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.
(so does most of their owners)

27. A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.

28. It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

29. The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world.

30. In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak.
(mute justice?)

31. The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a
radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.
(Hot Chocolate? Atleast it was not his brain).

32. Mr. Rogers is an ordained minister.
(explains how is talks)

33. The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
(and we wonder why commericial breaks normally only last 5 minutes)

34. There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.

35. "Stewardesses" is the longest word that is typed with only
the left hand.
(explains all the stains in the bathroom?)