[BLACKJACK]

THERE SEEMS TO BE NO END OF INTERESTING THINGS THAT HAPPEN WHEN DRIVING A COBRA. THESE THREE ARE TIED FOR FIRST PLACE IN MY "LAUGH CATALOG".

1. TWO YEARS AGO WHILE DRIVING WITH THE "ANTIQUE CAR CLUB" IN THE SHRINERS PARADE IN ALEXANDRIA, VA PEOPLE WERE STANDING ON THE SIDEWALKS AS WELL AS SITTING ON THE CURBS. I GLANCED OVER TO THE LEFT AT A STRIKINGLY BEAUTIFUL YOUNG WOMAN WHO WAS SITTING ON THE CURB WITH HER KNEES SUPPORING HER ELBOWS - SHE RECOGNIZED MY LOOK OF APPRECIATION (SOMETHING LIKE A DIRTY OLD MAN'S LEER) AND SPREAD HER KNEES A LITTLE WIDER AND SMILED AT ME WITH BOTH SETS OF LIPS. I WAS SO JOLTED THAT I DAMN NEAR RAN INTO THE BACK OF A 1950 LINCOLN WHICH WAS IN FRONT OF ME. SHE MUST STILL BE LAUGHING AT THE LOOK THAT HAD TO BE ON MY FACE.

2. THIS PAST MAY, AT THE CARLISLE, PA SHOW, I ASKED PETER PORTANTE (THE "FACE MAN" OF ERA COBRAS) TO SIGN MY GLOVE BOX DOOR WITH A SILVER PAINT PEN. (PETER IS NOW OFFERING THIS SERVICE TO OTHER ERA OWNERS AS AN "EXTRA COST OPTION). A FEW WEEKS LATER I WAS IN A MALL AT LEESBURG, VA AND SOME - SOMEWHAT AROGANT CHARACTER - WITH A SARCASTIC ATTITUDE ASKED ME "IS THAT A REAL COBRA?" I REPLIED "WHAT DO YOU THINK? THE GLOVE BOX DOOR IS EVEN SIGNED BY PETER PORTANTE". HE LOOKED AT THE GLOVE BOX DOOR THEN BACK AT ME IN AMAZEMENT AND SAID "WOW, I THOUGHT SO. IT'S GORGEOUS". HE PROBABLY WILL TELL THE STORY TO ENOUGH PEOPLE THAT ONE OF THEM WILL KNOW WHO PETER PORTANTE IS. I'D LIKE TO SEE THE LOOK ON HIS FACE WHEN THAT HAPPENS.

3. WHILE TRYING TO SORT OUT A MYSTERIOUS - AND VERY ANOYING - VIBRATION IN THE EXCALIBUR COBRA A YEAR AGO WE WOULD WORK ON THE FRONT END, TIRES ETC. AND I'D TAKE IT OUT ONTO PRINCE WILLIAM PARKWAY AND RUN IT AT SPEED TO MEASURE THE EFFECTS OF OUR EFFORTS. I HAD MY OLD AVIATORS "KNEE BOARD" ON MY RIGHT THIGH AND A CHART CLIPPED TO IT WITH ONE COLUMN READING IN 10 MPH INCREMENTS FROM 30 TO 130 MPH. THE ADJACENT COLUMN WAS BLANK AND I WOULD PENCIL IN NOTES AS TO THE VIBRATION AT EACH SPEED INCREMENT. SEVERAL TRIPS UP AND DOWN THE P.W. PARKWAY AND I HAD A GOOD IDEA WHERE THE POLICE CARS WERE LURKING. MY LAST RUN WAS TO BE A HI SPEED RUN SO I WAS PARTICULARLY COGNIZANT OF TRAFFIC AND PATROL CAR LOCATIONS. I DROVE SEVERAL MILES TO THE SOUTH OF MANASSAS, VA, CHOSE A GOOD TURN AROUND SPOT, WAITED FOR TRAFFIC TO GET WELL AHEAD OF ME AND "KICKED IT IN THE A$$ - HARD. I MADE MY LAST CHART ENTRY NOTE AT 130 MPH BACKED OFF AND COASTED SOME DISTANCE TO A TRAFFIC LIGHT. I STOPPED AND WAS SCANNING MY NOTES WHEN A POLICE CAR PULLED ALONG SIDE. HE DIDN'T HIT THE SIREN - HE JUST TAPPED THE HORN TWICE TO GET MY ATTENTION. WHEN I LOOKED OVER AT HIM HE WAS GIVING ME A STERN LOOK AND WAGGING HIS FINGER AT ME. I HAD NO IDEA WHERE HE CAME FROM OR HOW FAST HE SAW ME GOING. HE JUST DROVE OFF - - SLOWLY - - AS DID I. I'M CONVINCED THAT IT WAS THE MOP OF GREY HAIR THAT DID IT. HAD I BEEN SMARTER WHEN I WAS YOUNGER I WOULD HAVE DYED MY HAIR GREY THIRTY YEARS EARLIER.

ONE OF THE FEW ADVANTAGES TO BEING AN OLD FART.

Y'ALL HAVE A REALLY GREAT DAY.

BLACKJACK