Channel Lock sells a filter wrench (non-band type) that is purpose built for what you need. Summit Racing sells them.
Or (when removing) you can always drive a Philips-head screwdriver through the can and that usually works, too.
Also, put on some latex mechanics gloves and that will give you the grip to tighten it another 1/2 turn. They don't have to be on super tight.
-Dean