[cobra de capell]

• What do you call a woman who has lost 95% of her intelligence? Divorced...

• Bigamy is having one wife too many... Some say monogamy is the same...

• Marriage is a 3-ring circus: Engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffer-ring...

• The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, “What’s on the TV?” I said, “Dust!”

• My wife and I are inseparable. In fact, last week it took four state troopers and a dog to pull us apart...

• Why do men die before their wives? They want to...

• What is the difference between a dog and a fox? About 5 shots of tequila...

• A beggar walked up to a well-dressed woman shopping on Rodeo Drive and said, “I haven’t eaten anything in four days.” She looked at him and said, “God, I wish I had your willpower.”
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HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN
Wine her,
Dine her,
Call her,
Hug her,
Hold her,
Surprise her,
Compliment her,
Smile at her,
Laugh with her,
Cry with her,
Cuddle with her,
Shop with her,
Give her jewelry,
Buy her flowers,
Hold her hand,
Write love letters to her,
Go to the end of the earth and back again for her.

HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN
Show up naked.
Bring beer.