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Kirkham Motorsports

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Old 08-05-2002, 07:35 PM
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Q: What is the definition of blood, sweat and tears?
A: A blonde standing in front of a tampon machine with a bent quarter.

Q: Why don't Irish men ever exercise?
A: They figure if God had wanted them to bend over,
He would have put booze on the floor.

Q: What's the difference between your wife and your washing machine?
A: You don't have to hug your washing machine for twenty minutes
after you dump your load in it.

Q: You know the worst thing about oral sex?
A: The view.

Q: What do you call a sheep that runs around with forty thieves?
A: Ali Baa Baa.

Q: What is fo-fi-fo, fo-fi-fi-fo?
A: A black girl giving out her phone number.

Q: What did Bruce Willis find on the top of Mt. Everest?
A: Icy dead people.

Q: Why is turtle wax so expensive?
A: Turtles have such tiny ears.

Q: What do you call a rabbit with a bent dick?
A: ****s Funny.

Q: Did you hear about the new Jewish game show?
A: It's called "The Price Is Too Much."

Q: In what state was Abraham Lincoln born?
A: Naked and screaming, just like the rest of us.

Q: How does a girl vampire flirt?
A: She bats her eyes.

Q: If Tarzan and Jane were Jewish, what would Cheetah be?
A: A fur coat.

Q: If a swamp frog goes "rib-bit ... rib-bit ... rib-bit" and a
Budweiser frog goes "bud ... wis ... er," what does a
Microsoft Windows frog sound like?
A: "Re-boot ... re- boot ... re-boot."

Q: Why do blonde nurses carry a red Magic Marker?
A: In case they have to draw blood.

Q: What do a divorce in Alabama, a tornado in Kansas,
and a hurricane in Florida have in common?
A: Somebody's fixin' to lose them a trailer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~

Alabama Special Forces
> > >
> > >
The latest ploy to drive the Taliban and Al Queda out of the mountains of
Afghanistan is to send in a team of Alabama Special Forces.

Billy Bob, Bubba, Boo, Scooter, and Cooter are being sent in with the following info about the Taliban:

1. There is no limit.
2. The season opened last weekend.
3. They taste just like chicken.
4. They don't like beer, pickup trucks, country music, or Jesus.
5. Some are queer.
6. They don't like barbeque.
7. They were responsible for Dale Earnhardt's death.

Should be over in just about a week.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
__________________
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