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Ron61 01-14-2008 04:03 PM

Send The Old Guys
 
New Direction for the war on terrorists.
Send Service Vets over 60

If you're over 60, the armed forces think you're too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing assbackwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.
For starters:

Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-*****.

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brain-teaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course, however. No on who's been in combat ever saw a 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did they ever do any pushups after completing basic training. I can hear the Drill Sgt. in the 'New army' now, 'Get down and give me ... er ... one.'

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.


These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

If nothing else, put us on border patrol....we will have it secured the first night!

This is purposely in big type so you can read it


Ron :LOL:

WildBill3 01-14-2008 07:55 PM

were do I sign up

Rick Parker 01-14-2008 08:51 PM

LMAO.....May have a point though?

http://youtube.com/watch?v=QA8x_YypfjA

427 S/O 01-15-2008 03:43 AM

Good idea Ron, this is why WE should go...an old friend's (former marine) son enlisted in the marines about 4-5 years ago, a few weeks after he enlisted
his dad and I were having lunch, I ask how the boy was doing and he said Oh!, he's home?, What!, I thought he may have flunked out or something but NO....he QUIT!. No kidding guys, Now you can quit if it you don't like it?.

Just thinking about doing that makes me sick to my stomach.

Unbelievable??, what the he$$ is going on here?. How do you teach responsibility if they have an easy out at every turn?. I have great respect for the majority who never considered quiting and do their duty everyday. God bless them.....

Ron61 01-15-2008 04:37 AM

Perry,

When I was in the service you sure couldn't quit. And if you flunked out of a course, you automatically became a cook or fox hole digger. I never heard of joining any branch and quitting if you don't like it. :confused:

Ron :(

imagine2frolic 01-15-2008 09:07 AM

YOU CAN QUIT????? That's pitiful, but it gives you a whole new insight on the young men, and women that are sticking it out!

ssssss 01-17-2008 12:04 AM

If I Go, Do I Still Receive My Social Security Check???

Charlie, K

Ron61 01-17-2008 01:59 AM

:)

I want to be a General. They get paid more than my disability is. :3DSMILE:

Ron :)

427 S/O 01-17-2008 03:40 AM

I would insist they let me have this, a new definition of 'terminator'.

http://images.google.com/imgres?imgu...%3Den%26sa%3DN

Ron61 01-17-2008 03:46 AM

I saw that once on one of the TV shows about modern weapons. Very impressive.

Ron :)

427 S/O 01-17-2008 08:17 AM

Indeed, sounds nothing like you would expect, it HMMMMMMMMMMM's

uncltodd 01-17-2008 01:34 PM

Ron, a most excellent post that I stole and sent every F-ing where!

With a mild chastisement, could you retitle, "Vets Over 50"?

I want in. Barely.

Ron61 01-18-2008 03:40 AM

:)

U.T.,

At my age you are still a child. But you are welcome. I can show you how to make a spear out of stone and a stick. :LOL:

Ron :)

Doug I 01-18-2008 06:52 AM

Ron - the latest development is using a stick and a stone to make fire !! ;)

Ron61 01-18-2008 06:56 AM

:confused:

Doug,

We used the fire from the volcanoes before they stopped running lava all over everywhere. Then came the rubbing two sticks or a stick and stone method. You are using MODERN technology. :LOL:

Ron :D

Doug I 01-18-2008 07:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ron61
:confused:

Doug,

..... or a stick and stone method ....

Ron :D

That's what I meant ;) So u c u r up 2 date with the modern technical stuff :D

Ron61 01-18-2008 11:20 AM

:LOL:

Doug,

The stick and stone method sure beats trying to get close enough to hot lava to start a stick burning so you can build a fire. Modern technology is great isn't it. :LOL:

Ron :JEKYLHYDE

Doug I 01-18-2008 11:59 AM

I wonder what will happen if we sharpen a strong stick and throw it at animals ?

Ron61 01-19-2008 05:40 AM

:rolleyes:

Depending on the animal and it's size and temper I would say run. Some of the dinosaurs got downright ticked if you bothered them in any way. :D

Ron :LOL:

Doug I 01-19-2008 01:42 PM

I guess we'll have to wait for evolution to turn them into chickens then. :)


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