Womens Golf Attire

[Terry Stapley]

Golf Attire


The Swede's wife stepped up to the tee and, as she bent over to place her ball, a gust of wind blew her skirt up and revealed her lack of underwear.

"Good Gracious, woman! Why aren't you wearing any skivvies?", Ole demanded.

"Well, you don't give me enough housekeeping money to afford any," she replied.

The Swede immediately reached into his pocket and said, "For the sake of decency, here's $50. Go and buy yourself some underwear."


Next, the Irishman's wife bent over to set her ball on the tee. Her skirt also blew up to show that she, too, is wearing no undies. "Holey Moley, woman! You've no knickers. Why not?"

She replied, "I can't afford any on the little money you give me."

Patrick reached into his pocket and said, "For the sake of decency, here's $20. Go out and buy yourself some underwear!"


Lastly, the Scotsman's wife bent over. The wind also took her skirt over her head to reveal that she, too, is commando.

"Sweet mudder, Aggie! Where the friggin heck are yer drawers?"

She too explained, 'You dinna give me enough money to be able at affarrd any."

The Scotsman reaches into his pocket and said, "Well, fer the love 'o decency, here's a comb. Tidy yerself up a bit."

[Ron61]

Terry,

With things the way they are now, we need all of the jokes and light hearted banter we can find. Before Obama and Pelosi ban them.

Ron

[Ron61]

An e-mailthat I just received.

A man was leaving a cafe with his morning coffee when he noticed a most
unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black
hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a pit bull dog on a leash. Behind him were 200 men walking single file.

The man couldn't stand the curiosity. He respectfully approached the man
walking the dog and said, "I am so sorry for your loss, and I know now is a
bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this. Whose
funeral is it?"

The man replied, "Well, that first hearse is for my wife."

"What happened to her?"

The man replied, "My dog attacked and killed her."

He inquired further, "Well, who is in the second hearse?"

The man answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog turned on her."

A poignant and thoughtful moment of silence passes between the two men.

"Can I borrow the dog?"

"Get in line."

Ron

[Jay Little]

A man was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, 'You're beautiful.' Then he fell asleep again.

His wife had never heard him say that before, so she stayed by his side. A few minutes later his eyes fluttered open and he said, 'You're cute.' The wife was disappointed because instead of 'beautiful,' it was now 'cute.'

She asked, 'What happened to beautiful?'

The man replied, 'The drugs are wearing off.'

[trularin]

I can see how this thread could make a good run.

[Fred Douglass]

...ye noo hoo they make copper wire, don't ye?

A: they poot ah penna b'tween twooooo Scoots, Laddie!!!

(Hey, I'm an American of undiluted Scots ancestry....I resemble that remark!!!)

[Terry Stapley]

Very good rendition!!

[Roscoe]

Hey? Didn't I post this golf joke yesterday??
Roscoe