Weber, Ruby, Lola, She is know by many names!

race-it · #1 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 10:27 AM

I first laid eyes on her at Barrett Jackson. Their she was under the hood of this guys Cobra. A real looker and I was not the only guy to feel uncomfortable staring at her with her guy standing their. Call it lust, wantonness, or what ever you want, She was stacked and sprawled across this guys power plant. I was smitten and had to have her for my own. Little did I know at the time she was a cross dresser. Her name could have been Lola, or Ruby but her name Weber. She should have been named Hooker but that was already taken. She was a vixen who took my love to town. Oh Ya, she was nice, Eye Candy with the promise of performance but when your pipes get hot she wants to back off and explode to your embarrassment. My advise is when you see her, leave her alone. She comes from the black hole where motor wizards, and tune up guru's dwell. The land where, up is down, in is usually out, more is really less, and if you have enough, give it more.
I tried to please her by welding my collectors together (not many guyes will do that for their part time lover!) and re gasket-ed to prevent air getting in. I adjusted the fuel pump, changed her jets, adjusted her idle, bought her her own air fuel ratio meter and she still carelessly dumps my fuel down the drain! But I'm smitten. Any cure for the desease she can leave you with?

What a vixen !

Stop the fuel loss is all I want from her! Any suggestions!

Steve Bisson · #2 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 01:53 PM

Damn Jim, you are getting good with that prose.

As with some eye candy, what you see is all there is. There may be a few exceptions but generally not. They are nice to be around as they add interest to a gathering, instill a sense of envy with those who do not possess them and for the owners, a step up on the status ladder. The problem occurs, as you know by now, when the guests and onlookers have departed, when the music has stopped, the lights have been turned down and the doors have been closed; this is when you realize how shallow this relationship has become.

In the beginning there was a sense of excitement, the anticipation of pleasures to come. The thoughts of raw, unabashed, wild desires for conquest drives a man to ignore the warning signs. It's all superficial. There is nothing of substance. None of it is real. It glistens and shines, stands tall and perky but it's all a facade. It does not perform other than raising your frustration to pain inducing levels. Some men can realize the mistake, take their loses, walk away and start over. Others never recognize the descending spiral they are in and are doomed to be controlled by pleasures imagined but never found.

Dump the whore and get a Holley.

race-it · #3 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 02:18 PM

Steve, Your command of the english language leaves me to grovle at your feet. Well put, well timed, and generously dished out.

As one man said" A word to the wise is sufficent!!!!

Jim

Rick Parker · #4 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 02:22 PM

I think you both have got what is called Cabin Fever! Swine Flu from the South and this from the North? I'm gettin out of here and going for a drive and listen to MY Webers. No problems once they are dialed in

They are just sexy fuel mixers.

jwd · #5 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 02:42 PM

Are you guys talking about my ex-wife? You described her perfectly. In the end, even though she was nice to look at, I got tired of the crap and finally cut my losses and got rid of her. Wasted a lot of money but I'm glad she's gone.

Jim (TOO)

Steve Bisson · #6 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 03:00 PM

Rick,

You may be right in your assessment. Unlike Southern CA we suffer from a short driving season. After a while it takes it's toll. It looks like relief may come this weekend. Hope's flame burns eternal.

jwd · #7 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 04:34 PM

Today was beautiful. Took both my toys for a cruise and gased them up. Which functions are going to tomrrow Steve?

Jim (TOO)

race-it · #8 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 05:03 PM

Rick, Please send video with sound to prove you can really drive your car with webers. So their was one nice girl in the whole family and you got her. You don't have to flaunt her. PS, We are having a family reunion in Tacoma come up and meet all the weber girls. You will find them in back alleys, under work benches and hanging around recycle bins.

Steve, Please help me, I think I'm falling for her again!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jim too, Was your first wifes last name weber? I think I know her sister.

This weekend I will be setting in my garage with a $65,000 babe that's stacked but only farts when I get on her!!!!!!!!!
Due to humiliation and lack of achievement , I am changing my name from Race-it to Face-It!

QUESTION! How many cobras with Weber's have you really seen driving up the road? NONE for me is the answer!!!!!!!!!!!

Jim

Steve Bisson · #9 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 05:29 PM

Jim (Too),

As my hood is not yet ready, I'm not to keen on driving the Cobra hood-less.
There's a chance it may be available this evening but without the stripe. If that's the case I'll install it and head on over to North Bend to visit with Doug (Stinson Pilot). If it's not available I'll sit in the garage and sulk.

I'll know either way by this evening.) Update: Jim (Race-it) will be my passenger as we head on over to North Bend. His car has that annoying Weber popping and mine won't have the hood painted until Tuesday. We make quite a pair.

Silverback51 · #10 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 08:02 PM

Dump that B!tch.

Sorry Jim. I don't have the way with words that Steve does, but I think I got the point across.