Not much to add to the viewpoints others have already expressed - It depends on the neighborhood.
Some HOA's are benign, and focus on common area landscape maintenance, and on coordinating community yard sales... The HOA in the neighborhood where we own our rental house rarely gets more offensive than sending a nasty gram about the weeds in the front yard, or a car that has been parked on the street for more than a few days.
Other neighborhoods? Well, the term "neighborhood nazi" is not so popular without good reason...
Our primary residence now is in a 50 year old neighborhood with no HOA, and I'm never moving again...
The primary thing to do is to have your real estate agent pull up the CCR's for any neighborhood you might be interested in, and give them a good read.
- If the policies are focused more on enumerating the HOA's primary duties, and if it has clauses that limit the amount of time a particular person can serve on the HOA board, than it will probably be an ok neighborhood - If the rules and regs focus more on what the HOMEOWNER is and isn't allowed to do, then that neighborhood is at risk of becoming a "socialist paradise" the moment the wrong person is elected to be HOA chairman...
JMHO
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