Joke of the Day...

[CobraDan]

1. Where did headlight dimmer switches used to be located?
a . On the floor shift knob
b. On the floor, left of the clutch
c. Next to the horn
2. The bottle top of a Royal Crown Cola bottle has holes in it. For what was
it used?
a. Capture lightning bugs.
b. To sprinkle clothes before ironing
c. Large salt shaker
3. Why was having milk delivered a problem in northern winters?
a. Cows got cold and would not produce
b. Ice on highways forced delivery by dog sled
c. Milkmen left deliveries outside doors and milk would freeze, expanding
and pushing up the cardboard bottle top.
4. What was the popular chewing gum named for a game of chance?
a. Blackjack
b. Gin
c. Craps
5. What method did women adapt to look as if they were wearing stockings
when none was available due to rationing during W.W.II?
a. Suntan
b. Leg painting
c. Wearing slacks
6. What postwar car turned automotive design on its ear when you could not
tell whether it was coming or going?
a. Studebaker
b. Nash Metro
c. Tucker
7. Which was a popular candy when you were a kid?
a. Strips of dried peanut butter
b. Chocolate-licorice bars
c. Wax coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside
8. How was Butch wax used?
a. To stiffen hair cut into a flattop so it stood up
b. To make floors shiny and prevent scuffing
c. On the wheels of roller skates to prevent rust
9. Before inline skates, how did you keep your roller skates attached to
your shoes?
a. With clamps, tightened by a skate key
b. Woven straps that crossed the foot
c. Long pieces of string or twine
10. As a kid, what was considered the best way to reach a decision?
a. Consider all the facts
b. Ask Mom
c. Eeny-meeny-miney-mo
11. What was the worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex?
a. A cold
b. VD
c. Cooties
12. I'll be down to get you in a ________, Honey?"
a. SUV
b. Taxi
c. Streetcar
13. What was the name of Caroline Kennedy's pet pony?
a. Old Blue
b. Paint
c. Macaroni
14. What was a Duck-and-Cover Drill?
a. Part of the game of hide and seek
b. What you did when your mom called you in to do chores
c. Hiding under your desk, covering your head with your arms in an A bomb
drill
15. What was the name of the Indian Princess on the Howdy Doody show?
a. Princess Summerfallwinterspring
b. Princess Sacajewea
c. Princess Moonshadow
16. What did all really savvy students do when mimeographed tests were
handed out in school?
a. Immediately sniffed the purple ink, as this was believed to get you high
b. Made paper airplanes to see who could sail theirs out the window
c. Wrote another pupils name on the top, to avoid failure
17. Why did your mom shop in stores that gave Green Stamps with purchases?
a. To keep you out of mischief licking the backs, which tasted like bubble
gum
b. They could be put in special books and redeemed for various household
items
c. They were given to the kids to be used as stick on tattoos
18. Praise the Lord, and pass the _________
a. Meatballs
b. Dames
c. Ammunition
19. What was the name of the group who made the song Cab driver a hit?
a. The Ink Spots
b. The Supremes
c. The Esquires
20. Who left his heart in San Francisco?
a. Tony Bennett
b. Zavier Cugat
c. George Gershwin

ANSWERS
1. b) On the floor, left of the clutch. Hand controls, popular in Europe,
took till the 60s to catch on.
2. b) To sprinkle clothes before ironing. Who had a steam iron?
3. c) Cold weather caused the milk to freeze and expand, popping the bottle
top.
4. a) Blackjack Gum.
5. b) Special makeup was applied followed by drawing a seam down the back of
the leg with eyebrow pencil.
6. a) 1946 Studebaker.
7. c) Wax coke bottles containing super-sweet colored water.
8. a) Wax for your flat top (butch) haircut.
9. a) With clamps, tightened by a skate key, which you wore on a shoestring
around your neck.
10. c) Eeny-meeny-miney-mo.
11. c) Cooties.
12. b) Taxi. Better be ready by half-past eight!
13. c) Macaroni.
14. c) Hiding under your desk, covering your head with your arms in an
A-bomb drill.
15. a) Princess Summerfallwinterspring. She was another puppet.
16. a) Immediately sniffed the purple ink to get high.
17. b) Put in a special stamp book, they could be traded for household items
at the Green Stamp store.
18. c) Ammunition
19. a) The all male, all black group, The Inkspots.
20. a) Tony Bennett and he sounds just as good today.

SCORING
17- 20 correct: You are not only older than dirt, but obviously gifted
with mind bloat. Now if you could only find your glasses.
12 - 16 correct: Not quite dirt yet, but your mind is definitely muddy.
0 - 11 correct: You are a sad excuse of a geezer.