Joke of the Day...

[Gunner]

A cop is cruising roads around the lake after dark and he comes on a car parked on the shoulder. He gets out and approaches it cautiously, flashlight out. Inside are two teens.

"Hey," he says, "What are you doing?"

"Well," the boy says, "I'm reading a book." He shows it to the cop.

"And you?" the cop asks the girl.

"I'm knitting a sweater. See? Almost done." She held it up.

The cop scratches his head for a moment. Then he asks the boy, "How old are you?"

Boy says, "Nineteen, sir."

The cop asks, "And her?"

"Well, sir," she replied, "in twenty-two minutes I'll be eighteen."

[Rick Parker]

The Girls next door asked me what I would like for my birthday.
I was quite surprised when they gave me a Rolex.

It was very nice of them, but I think they misunderstood me when I said, "I wanna watch."

[mk2gt40]

A blonde teenager, wanting to earn some extra money for the summer,
> decided to hire herself out as a 'handy-woman' and started canvassing a
> nearby well-to-do neighborhood.
>
>
>
> She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he
> had any odd jobs for her to do.
>
>
> 'Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch,' he said, 'How
> much will you charge me?'
>
>
> Delighted, the girl quickly responded, 'How about $50?'
>
>
>
> The man agreed and told her that the paint brushes and everything she
> would need was in the garage.
>
>
> The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband,
>
>
>
> 'Does she realize that our porch goes ALL the way around the house?'
>
>
> He responded, 'That's a bit cynical, isn't it?'
>
>
> The wife replied, 'You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all
> those dumb blonde jokes we've been getting by e-mail lately.'
>
>
>
> Later that day, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
>
>
> 'You're finished already?' the startled husband asked.
>
>
> 'Yes, the blonde replied, and I even had paint left over, so I gave it
> two coats.'
>
>
> Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed it
> to her along with a ten dollar tip.
>
>
> *'And by the way,' the blonde added, 'it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus.'*
>
>

[fordracer]

A little Polish girl asks her mother, " Mom, is it true that babies come out where the man puts his penis? "

Mom replies, " Yes my dear, babies come from where the man puts his penis."

Shocked the girl asks, " Won't that hurt my mouth? "



Hear about the new Mexican sports car? It's got 4 on the floor and 12 in back.