Jokes

[letsboogie351]

A mother and father take their 6-year old son to a nude beach.
As the boy walks along the sand, he notices that many of the women have boobs bigger than his mother's, so he goes back to ask her why.

She tells her son, 'The bigger they are, the sillier the lady is.'
The boy, pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocean but returns to tell his mother that many of the men have larger things than his dad does.
She replies, 'The bigger they are, the dumber the man is'
again satisfied with her answer, the boy goes back to the ocean to play.

Shortly thereafter, the boy returns and promptly tells his mother,
'Daddy is talking to the silliest lady on the beach, and the longer he talks, the dumber he gets.'

[Ron61]

The Hotel Bill

An elderly woman decided to give herself a big treat for her significant birthday by staying overnight in one of London's most expensive hotels.

When she checked out the next morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for 250.00.

She exploded and demanded to know why the charge was so high. "It's a nice hotel but the rooms are certainly not worth 250.00 for just an overnight stop. You didn't even serve breakfast.”

The clerk told her that 250.00 is the 'standard rate,' so she insisted on speaking with the Manager.

The Manager appeared and, forewarned by the desk clerk announced: "The hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center which are available for use.”

"But I didn't use them," she said.

''Well, they are here, and you could have," explained the Manager.

He went on to explain that she could also have seen one of the in-hotel shows for which the hotel is famous. "We have the best entertainers from Edinburgh, Glasgow, and Aberdeen performing here," the Manager said.

"But I didn't go to any of those shows," she said.

"Well, we have them, and you could have," the Manager replied.

No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, she replied, "But I didn't use it!"

The Manager was unmoved, so she decided to pay and wrote a check. She handed it to the Manager.

The Manager was surprised when he looked at the check. "But madam, this check is only made out for 50.00."

''That's correct. I charged you 200.00 for sleeping with me," she replied.

"But I didn't!" exclaimed the very surprised Manager.

"Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have."