There's three guys on a bridge; an American, a Mexican and an Asian.
They decide to throw something they have too much of in their country, off the bridge.
First the Asian throws over a large bag of rice.
Then the Mexican throws over a large bag of beans.
Then the American throws over the Mexican.
_____
Corporate Stereotypes
The Long Hours Guy
The dude just can’t find time to go home. He has too much to do and too little time. He hardly ever takes vacation and bases his entire self-worth on the sheer number of hours he puts in at work. He likes to complain to others about the insane hours and how he has way too many projects right now. He definitely has an elevated sense of self-importance, and believes that his hard-working image sets him apart from others. What a crock. Get a life dude!
The Do-Nothing Guy
You know who I’m talking about here. There’s always some guy who gets a decent paycheck that pretty much does absolutely nothing. His job function is mysterious, and everyone tries to figure out how he gets away with it. He has inexplicably ingrained himself into the organization by having no responsibility or accountability, and yet is retained by the company while other more assiduous and competent employees are let go. Tell us how you do it, Do-Nothing Guy?
How Do I Use Outlook Guy
Almost every executive falls into this category. They have a computer, but have no inkling of how it actually works. Creating a distribution list is amazingly complicated and confusing for these individuals, a task that is often delegated to someone else in the department. They can’t use any of the basic or standard office software and usually ask for printed copies so they can read the information. You gotta be kidding me? Get your kids to show you how a computer works!
Mr. Dinosaur
A relative of Outlook Guy, but must fall into the “old” category of your company. Is extremely resistant to change and likes to talk about accomplishments from 30 years ago and “how they used to do things.” Pretty much steals everyone else’s ideas and pawns them off as his own. Never does any of the work and tries to delegate because of his seniority. The guy should retire but chooses not to. Dude, no one cares what you did 30 years ago, retire already so someone much more deserving can move up!
Know-It-All Newbie
This fresh college grad. comes into the company thinking about all the amazing things they’re going to do and accomplish at the company. They are extremely idealistic and naive. Many times, they don’t know when to just shutup and listen. Their conversation and life revolves around texting, episodes showing on MTV, their current boyfriend/girlfriend, and their new car. News flash: the system will break you down and no one cares about how drunk you got last weekend.
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