Jokes

[cobra de capell]

Did you know:

That the words race car spelled backward says race car.

That eat is the only word that if you take the 1st letter and move it to the last, it spells it's past tense ate.

Have you noticed that if you rearrange the letters in "illegal immigrants," and add just a few more letters, it spells out:

"F$%k off and go home you free-loading, benefit grabbing, kid producing, violent, non-English speaking c$%ksuckers and take those hairy faced, sandal wearing, bomb making, goat f$%king, smelly rag head bastards with you."

How weird is that?
_____

A city cop was on his horse waiting to cross the street when a little
girl on her new shiny bike stopped beside him.

'Nice bike,' the cop said, 'Did Santa bring it to you?'

'Yep,' the little girl said, 'he sure did!'

The cop looked the bike over and handed the girl a $5 ticket for a safety violation. The cop said, 'Next year tell Santa to put a reflector light on the back of it.'

The young girl looked up at the cop and said, 'Nice horse you got, did
Santa bring it to you?'

'Yes, he sure did,' chuckled the cop.

The little girl looked up at the cop and said, 'Next year tell Santa
the dick goes underneath the horse, not on top.'
_____

A blonde teenage girl, wanting to earn some extra money for the
summer, decided to hire herself out as a 'handy-woman' and started canvassing
a nearby well-to-do neighborhood.

She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if
he had any odd jobs for her to do.

'Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch,' he said.
'How much will you charge me?'

Delighted, the girl quickly responded, 'How about $50?'

The man agreed and told her that the paint brushes and everything
she would need was in the garage. The man's wife, hearing the conversation
said to her husband, 'Does she realize that our porch goes ALL the way
around the house?'

He responded, 'That's a bit cynical, isn't it?'

The wife replied, 'You're right. I guess I'm starting to Believe
all those dumb blonde jokes'.

Later that day, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.

'You're finished already?' the startled husband asked.
'Yes, the blonde replied, and I even had paint left over, so I gave
it two coats.'

Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed
it to her along with a ten dollar tip.

'And by the way,' the blonde added, 'it's not a Porch,
it's a Lexus.'