Jokes

[392cobra]

To try and keep the local Liberal censors/critics from wasting their time....This is not mine,it is a copy & paste.Like everything else on Jokes.


A Conservative discussion with a Liberal

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I have noticed that many liberals are never willing to argue fact, history, cause & effect, logic or moral principals. They rely instead upon their pop culture, music videos, the statements of clueless Hollywood celebrities, NBC, CBS, ABC, MSNBC, CNN, USA Today, New Your Times, People magazine, Rolling Stone magazine and Socialistic politicians to form their opinions.

In an effort to bridge this wide divide, I thought I would reduce a likely discussion to the form of an analogy of how Conservatives see things and how the Liberal Left sees things.

I kept it simple so that the Left would understand the valid point.

Liberal: My two year old Harley needs a new clutch pack so I got this chisel and hammer and I'm going to "rip it from the right" side tonight and then it'll pull and shift great!

Conservative: Well, I happen to know that if you're sitting on the bike, the clutch pack is on the left side of the newer Harleys.

L: You can't tell me what to do, I do what I want and think what I want! George Bush sucked and I'm never going to listen to you! As I sit on the bike, my clutch is on the right, I know it and you're never going to change my mind!

C: Have you ever worked on a Harley clutch before?

L: You're stupid, I know what I'm doing, you can't tell me what to do or think! Everyone should be forced to "rip it from the right"! We need to make it a law! We need Czars! We need Clutch N Trade regulations! We need the fairness doctrine to silence you, to keep you from telling me how to do it.

C: I'm not trying to tell you what to think, I just have experience in this matter as I have sacrificed much by working day and night as a Harley mechanic for 40 years and now I own the company that builds the clutches for Harley. I am the voice of logic, truth and experience.

L: I saw an Al Gore movie called "An inconvenient clutch" and he said the whole world's at risk and our problems can be easily solved by "ripping it from the right".

C: Well, if you "rip it from the right", it will destroy the inner structure and the entire supporting system will be destroyed rendering it weak, inoperative and worthless.

L: You're just a hate monger and you're destroying the planet! I hate you and we need to take everything you have and give it to those that deserve it! We need distributive change!

C: No, I'm just concerned that you are going to destroy Harley's for everyone by trying to make a law to force everyone to "rip it from the right". I don't hate you, I hate what you're doing to our Harleys!

L: I saw Michael Moore’s latest documentary "Fahrenheit Clutch" that proves the conspiracy of Bush and it's because of conservatives always removing clutches from the left.

C: That's how they need to be removed. My experience guides me and having done the hard work, I know the facts, details and specifications. It's called informed judgment.

L: You're an idiot, everyone knows that clutches need to be "ripped from the right"! I watched the MTV awards just last night and all the award winners said we need to "rip it from the right"! Jeneane Garapolo gave a vulgar rant on the topic and said you are just a tea bag toting redneck that hates the fact that clutch needs to be "ripped from the right"!

C: It doesn't matter what they say, they were all wrong. The simple fact of the matter is that you are listening to the wrong people. People who don't know what they are talking about. People who will lead you to destroy what we all love. People who follow them are not wise. Your reasoning is flawed by inexperience, incorrect information and deceit.

L: We need to unionize all the Harley mechanics into SEIU! We need to assemble Acorn & SEIU to protest in front of the Harley dealerships. We need to beat down elderly riders and bite the fingers off anyone who disagrees with us! We need Reverend Wright to enlighten everyone on how anyone objecting to "ripping it from the right" is a racist!

C: So, if historic fact, experience, detailed diagrams and common sense don't sway your opinion, what will?

L: Nothing, you suck, your logic sucks, you're a stupid racist and George Bush sucks!

C: And there you have it, a typical discussion with a Liberal.