Jokes

[Art Burtt]

I bet he ain't constipated anymore LOL

[cobra de capell]

I have a friend who saw her dream of proclaiming her love for tofu, mercilessly crushed by the California Division of Motor Vehicles.

They absolutely prohibited her from purchasing and displaying a vanity plate, designed to demonstrate her affection for that bean-curd stuff.

The DMV claimed that the plate would have been obscene. Kelley's plate was to have read:

ILVTOFU


Now who could mistake this wholesome sentiment for something else?
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Not a joke.....scary....

[cobra de capell]

Coffee Drinkers Pay Big For Cat Poop Coffee

TAMPA, Florida – A Florida coffee house is brewing up a buzz by selling the rarest type of coffee in the world—‘Cat Poop Coffee’.

‘Cat Poop Coffee’ comes from the Indonesian Civet which resembles a cat and eats coffee cherries off of trees.

The beans end up in the animal’s feces and the next step is to sift them by hand. The end result is a coffee bean considered a delicacy and only 500 pounds are made each year.

The coffee is one of the rarest in the world. The Tampa coffee shop, shown in the attached video, paid $190 per pound. Customers paid $20 for a 12 ounce cup.


http://www2.nbc4i.com/cmh/news/natio..._coffee/24107/

[cobra de capell]

You Know You're Over The Hill When...

1. You find yourself beginning to like accordion music.

2. You're sitting on a park bench and a Boy Scout comes up and helps you cross your legs.

3. Lawn care has become a big highlight of your life.

4. You tune into the easy listening station...on purpose.

5. You discover that your measurements are now small, medium and large...In that order.

6. You light the candles on your birthday cake and a group of campers form a circle and start singing Cumbaya..

7. You keep repeating yourself.

8. You start video taping daytime game shows.

9. At the airport, they ask to check your bags...and you're not carrying any luggage.

10. You wonder why you waited so long to take up macrame.

11. Your Insurance Company has started sending you their free calendar...a month at a time.

12. At cafeterias, you complain that the gelatin is too tough.

13. Your new easy chair has more options than your car.

14. When you do the "Hokey Pokey" you put your left hip out...and it stays out.

15. One of the throw pillows on your bed is a hot water bottle.

16. Conversations with people your own age often turn into "dueling ailments."

17. You keep repeating yourself.

18. It takes a couple of tries to get over a speed bump.

19. You discover the words, "whippersnapper, " "scalawag" and "by-cracky" creeping into your vocabulary.

20. You're on a TV game show and you decide to risk it all and go for the rocker.

21. You begin every other sentence with, "Nowadays... "

22. You run out of breath walking DOWN a flight of stairs.

23. You look both ways before crossing a room.

24. Your social security number only has three digits.

25. You keep repeating yourself.

26. You come to the conclusion that your worst enemy is gravity.

27. You go to a Garden Party and you're mainly interested in the garden.

28. You find your mouth making promises your body can't keep.

29. The waiter asks how you'd like your steak...and you say "pureed."

30. At parties you attend, "regularity" is considered the topic of choice.
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