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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 01-18-2009, 09:19 PM
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Default Lessor men need more wood.

Have you noticed that all enhancements for men commercials have either a C or V in the product labia?

Have you ever bought dinner for your wife and her two best friends only to find out that the evening left you with an extreme estrogen overload?

Why is it some can't just perk up and shout..

I need more WOOD!!!

Well this Oregon logger is here to help, I have way more WOOD than all my women can stand. I have so much WOOD that the little whinny twerps on Axmen beg to come to be on my crew. Unlike the ads in the back pages of all those mags you read I will give quadruple your money back if I can not double your WOOD!

Guys(that would be those that are not men) please let me help, you need WOOD I got it. Viagra costs $156,035,648 per ton. I can sell you all the real WOOD you need anywhere in the US for less that $74 per ton.

Discounts by railcar available …

Scott S
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Old 01-19-2009, 02:50 AM
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Scott,

Good luck on the wood sales. I think that about half the people around here that have pickups or trucks are selling it and the prices are really out of sight. My friend that runs then garage goes out on weekends and cuts wood and then he splits it and sells it during the week at work. I think he makes as much from the wood as he does the garage as business has just dropped off to almost nothing there.

Ron
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Old 01-19-2009, 05:57 AM
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Do you need a perscription?
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Old 01-19-2009, 07:44 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scott S View Post
Have you noticed that all enhancements for men commercials have either a C or V in the product labia?

Discounts by railcar available …

Scott S



If we need a railcar, we might actually get enough.
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Old 01-19-2009, 03:14 PM
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Talking

...

I swear, logging in here is like going to college.

Labia...

Part of a larger document on more than you would (wood) want to know.


Also:
Discounts by railcar available …

Coal is slowing down, too. I imagine Ford Foundry and industry in general is down again. Discounts on "discounts by railcar" available: I'll be dropping my prices on shipping carboniferous stuff by rail.

Trees: Smoke 'em if you got 'em. We don't have any here.

North Dakota State Tree


Wes


...
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Old 01-19-2009, 04:18 PM
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'If you pull your outer labia open, you will see your labia minora, or lips, which are not covered with hair, and look a bit like flower petals or two teeny-tiny tongues'.

Jeeze Wes, had to stop reading right there.........woody!!!!....
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Old 01-19-2009, 04:21 PM
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Yea mons!!!
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Old 01-19-2009, 05:06 PM
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i have very small, small wood thats why i have a cobra....
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Old 01-19-2009, 05:14 PM
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aw heck. so so so much to say........ i must not speak i must not speak i must not speak.
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Old 01-19-2009, 06:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wes Tausend View Post
...

I swear, logging in here is like going to college.

Labia...

Part of a larger document on more than you would (wood) want to know.

Wes


...
Wes,
Without a doubt those two links are by far the best links you have ever posted.It is heart warming to see someone spend there small amount of free time researching such an interesting and certainly important subject.

Do you have any homework assignments for us ?
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Old 01-19-2009, 06:53 PM
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Thumbs up Oh I get it.......

..."logging" in...ar-ar-ar

Yew guys went to collitch? I'm jealous!

Heck, it's just like eatin' fish out of a paint-brush.......

Ar-ar-ar-ar-oooodle.
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Old 01-19-2009, 07:03 PM
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Wes,
Without a doubt those two links are by far the best links you have ever posted.It is heart warming to see someone spend there small amount of free time researching such an interesting and certainly important subject.

Do you have any homework assignments for us ?

I always wondered what guys on freight trains do...

I promise to stop at all crossings from now on.

Scott S
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Old 01-19-2009, 07:12 PM
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Oh he!! no. Now I am in real trouble. I've been burning my wood to stay warm.

Dang it all I've got plenty of wood and know how to use it, but why wasn't I notified? Where is the freekin memo on the wood???

Scott S you are going to have to be more specific about the wood.

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Old 01-19-2009, 07:36 PM
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Here in the logging industry we use a whole assortment of rigging to haul in the WOOD. Some in our industry hire extra help to handle the rigging and wood.

In these tough times I am man enough to say, I pull my own rigging.

Scott S
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Old 01-19-2009, 07:41 PM
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Scott,
You might want to take a look at Wes's links and see if they offer any other options you might like better than pulling your rigging.
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Old 01-19-2009, 08:26 PM
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Thumbs up Countdown to PC nuking (thread shut-down)....

Youse guys is dangerous companions! I can see us "lily-padding" from thread to thread to thread, being pursued by the PC* guillotine!

.....five...four.....three....two.....

*Did i ever mention that the term "Politically Correct" is actually of communist origin? Yup, COMMUNIST! It seems the CPUSA (our own home-grown sh*theads) would rate movies. If the flick in question was one of those "rags-to-riches" ones so popular just before WW II----it would be rated "NOT PC". The reason? It showed impoverished people improving their lot by their own efforts----NOT BY DEPENDING ON THE FOO KEEN GOVERNMENT! H-m-m-m-m-m!
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Old 01-19-2009, 08:31 PM
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I'm laughin so hard,... I'm about readiy to throw-up all over my wood pile.

I know sombody might just tell me to...get a grip on it or something like that, but speaking of rigging, ropes, and tie-downs that do work well, a good come-along ( coffin hoist)will always make sure the load ends up where you want it. Now something important is to have a nice tight, strong box on your pick-up to not only contain all your wood because you don't want anything falling off and messing up the highway.
Well the best way is to cut your own wood and carry it anyway it's comfortable.

OLD Bill
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Old 01-19-2009, 09:08 PM
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Talking If PUNS could be burned.......

...this thread alone could heat the whole neighborhood....ar-ar-ar-ooooogle!
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Old 01-20-2009, 01:06 PM
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Last night I had my hands on another persons rigging, and it wasn't good for me, but probably for them it was! Frikking boat across the pier lost it's furling line to the headsail at 1am. There I am in the 30 knot wind hauling on some one else's come along to get the sail back in. You might have to be a sailor to get my drift....LOLOLOLOLOL......i2f
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Old 01-20-2009, 01:29 PM
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Wink Roller-reefing jibs?

Oh my. They're sorta like automatic trans-mish-eons!

Nuf sed.
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