Aussie Mike,
Took the froth right out of my sunburnt mouth, time for dinner up here, say have you Victorians had a feed this year ?

Don't know about a feed but we could do with some water down this way. All the dams are well down and we could end up on water restrictions again if this summer is a dry one. Farmers will be in trouble if we can't get a good reserve behind us.

Cheers

What wet season in the tropics? We haven't had any rain since last May and it has been the hottest summer in 100 years.

FYI:

I sent Amy's panties off to Wilf today.

I took a last sniff. Damn! I was getting attached to those things!

Oh well, I'm sure they'll be in good hands.

:3DSMILE:

ERA 534.9999999999

There there--I know you feel a loss...it was time.:LOL:

Wilf
Let us know when you get them--I know your hands will be shaking with anticipation of your private time with them--but try to type.

Amy's panties got sent off but not without a little embarrassment.

It seems that anything over one ounce has to go through customs, and since 9-11, inquiring minds are more active than usual. I should have realized this.

I have the panties in a large manila envelope. I give them to the woman at the post office, tell her where they are going and she weighs it and says that she has a few questions for me. She is talking too loudly for me - way too loudly. The place is packed with the usual post office type of people - you know two legs, a head, arms, conservative, nosy.

I am considering making a run for it, but after a government official tells you that something you have has to go through customs and they want to ask a few questions - well, only a stupid, crazed terrorist would run at that time. I may be a perverted scatological fart blower of the first order at times, but I am not stupid. Or a crazed terrorist. I tell her to go ahead and ask me anything she wants.

What is in the envelope? Womans underwear.

What kind? Panties.

New or used? Uh, used, I think.

What are they made from? Silk, I think.

Who do they belong to? I am not sure.

Why don't you know? Well, I was told they belong to someone named Amy.

By whom? They are signed by her.

Who are you sending them to? A person in England named Wilf. (Expect a call, Wilf)

I know that - What I mean is what is this persons relationship to you? No relation.

Well how do you know him? I really don't know him.

Well why are you sending "this item" (distastefully enounced) to him if you don't know him? We all belong to to a Cobra Club and this is a gag thing. I only know him over the internet.

What is the value of "this item". Nothing intrinsic.

What do you mean by that? It means it has other value - emotional, sentimental. That kind of value.

Puzzled look from woman. A few men in the crowd behind me are laughing.

Good luck Wilf!

I cannot believe that my name is now known in a post office in America as the intended recipient of a pair of used silk panties. What will they say in the club?? And will I now be disqualified from the Honours list? I was so looking forward to becoming "sir" Wilf.
Since my local postmaster is a friend of mine with a wicked sense of humour I rather think this can only go downhill from here.

What is the correct rate of import duty for panties. Is it like engines where you have to discriminate between "small" and "large"? Since I have witnessed pictorial evidence of the fact that they fit ERA007 I guess it's 4X's?? And so a higher rate of tax??

Wilf:CRY:

Wilf -

Having you name known in a Post Office in America is not that bad...having you picture posted in a Post Office in America - now that IS bad.
:LOL: :LOL:

You are correct in your guess about the import duty rate - it is however an inverse rate.

New large panties have a much lower rate than used smaller sizes. Amy's panties are quite small - with a natural floral odor that is quite pleasant indicating mild use - so the rate on these should be the higher rate.

You may be able to offset some of the import charges incurred by charging for sniffs from fellow club members.

ERA535/007

defamation of character
 

ERA0061/2 - I can only surmise that you have no sense of perspective - I just looked again at the picture of your good self adorned with the aforementioned panties and they do look to be a good fit, (and the colour suits you), so my guess of 4X's stands.

And, bearing in mind that there is more than anecdotal evidence that you may well have been emitting enough raw methane at the time to power a small power station, I can't believe the "light floral odour" (please do note sp) comment either.

As I said before, this can only get worse. (hopefully)

Wilf **)

I want to know HOW this thread can get much worse
 

I am soooooo embarrassed that I joined this club!! And soooo happy that I am not still in the central California area! ( and therefore do not have to meet with these hooligans face to face, OR snif some overly large receptionist's panties !) :3DSMILE:

we've only just begun
 

Watch and learn, watch and learn.


Wilf :LOL:

Something tells me we have awoken a giant among sick minds.**)

Well boys... it is time to take this to to a higher level.
Our International friend indicated that he is friends with the local postmaster, who has a "wicked sense of humour", I think we need to find a way to contact this fine postmaster and get him involved in the loop.

At that point it can only get better. Wilf, you wouldn't want to give this fine gentelman my email address and ask him to contact me as soon as possible, would you?

TURK

Turk - you are indeed prescient. You are absolutely correct in that I would not like to give that fine gentleman your email address. I'm sorry that I know it, and believe firmly that the rest of the world must be protected from it.

Wilf :3DSMILE:

Ok then, maybe you can give me HIS email address.
this is kind a like an I.Q test

TURK

You want what?
 

Now how could you recognise an IQ test?? And exactly how is this similar to one?? And no, I shall not be giving you his email address!

This Postmaster friend of mine will give me a hard enough time anyway when the time comes to post the transglobal gusset on to Aussie land!

Wilf

Wilf
Just let him be in the picture.:LOL:

Wilf,
Since everyone in CC is aware, there are only people in Aussieland anyway, consequently be advised that this whole nation will be witness to these undies. After I'm done with them, I'll dispatch the remaining threads to Aussie Mike who will probably invent some ultra conservative follow-up activity like washing them in a keg of VB, G_d forbid.

who's ultra conservative?
 

It's not often I get mentioned in the same sentince as the words "ultra conservative". If that's how you guys think of me I better do something about my image. I guess I'll have to include a picture with my next progress shots of me wearing nothing but a hollowed out pumpkin.

As for washing Amy's dirty linnen in a Keg of VB, that's a bit extreme. I figure just a couple of bottles would do the trick.

Cheers