Amy's Bloomers Around the World! - Page 3

ERA535 · #41 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 08:17 AM

I think that once you guys are able to savor these dainties in person you will realize that leaving them in their natural state is the way to go. That is, of course, based on the asssumption that Wild Wilf doesn't do something to them while they pass through his hands.
I am not holding out much hope that these delectables will be in any condition for further travel after Dave Samson has them. His comment "after I'm done with them, I'll dispatch the remaining threads to Aussie Mike........" gives me the mental image of someone who probably is into rough sex with undergarments. I can also a picture a whole trail of bleeding sheep.....

wilf leek · #42 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 09:55 AM

ERA0061/2 - I do believe that, since I have seen them adorning your very own personage, I shall be handling them only at arms length with tongs, possibly whilst enclosed in a full biowarfare protection suit, plus welder's helmet (quite good those).
I am going to send them on with a sworn affadavit that I have not added in any way to their biological loading. I am most certainly not going to be held responsible for what happens to them down under!

Is the image you summon up of "bleeding sheep" an indication that you a/ don't like them, or b/ are too rough with them? Either way I can see our august shepherd (Mr J) getting upset with the way you propose to deal with members of his family.

Mike - any other medicinal properties aaascribed to VB? I assume it's for external use only.

Wilf

PS just had a thought, do you think there could now be a market for "tong thingys"?

Jamo · #43 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 01:02 PM

I'm very upset,
You must be tender and sincere with sheep--at least kiss them and murmer sweet "baaaaaaaaas...."

wilf leek · #44 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 02:16 PM

"Sweet baaaaaaaaaaas" - isn't that Afrikans for something?

Wilf

Aussie Mike · #45 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 02:46 PM

VB has quite a few medicinal properties. It's good for curing sleep disorders, relieves constapation, breaks down social inhibitions, opens up negotiations between differing political or religeous ideals (normally the patients words are a bit hard to understand at this stage).

It does have some side effects: It affects hand eye co-ordination and consumptions of large quantities can cause severe headaches and a feeling of nausea (usually the morning after taking the medication).

It can be used externally but this often happens later in the evening once the patent is having significant hand eye coordiation difficulties.

Vic Bitter is a wonderful tonic and is often called Vitamin B by it's regular drinkers.

Cheers

wilf leek · #46 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 02:58 PM

Do you know, I think I may have come across similar preparations in the UK!

Wilf

ERA535 · #47 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 03:02 PM

Wilf - yes it is.

My Afrikaans was never very good - and since leaving SA I really haven't found much need for it - was I shocked!!!

BTW those dainty little garments were only worn OVER my Levi's....so they are actually fairly safe.

Jamo - where do you kiss sheep????? Behind their ears?

Jamo · #48 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 03:06 PM

Right smack on their facial lips--you might have to look for em.

wilf leek · #49 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 03:15 PM

eeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwweeeeee!

Wilf

Jamo · #50 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 03:20 PM

Wilf
Are you disgusted or are you calling one of my female lovelies?

Dave Samson · #51 (**permalink**) 02-04-2002, 05:14 PM

Aussie Mike,

Well you had us fooled, the only medicinal benefits that we bananbenders derive is the ability to get blind drunk and have a punch-up.

We don't find the hand-eye coordination as important as the hand-can coordination, just shows you that you Mexicans have a long social ladder to climb till you reach the heights of the Sunshine State.

wilf leek · #52 (**permalink**) 02-05-2002, 03:30 AM

Jamo - I think disgusted might just about swing it. Although I did once live very close to the Welsh border - UK sheep country, and there were some damm fine looking woolly jumpers around there!

Australian Brethren - thank you for reinforcing every stereotype of the Great Aussie Male I have heard to date. It's very comforting.

Wilf

Aussie Mike · #53 (**permalink**) 02-05-2002, 03:54 AM

No Worrys Cobber,

Strewth! me flamin Kangaroo has got out again. I'll just have to pop of and tie him down.

Cop ya later Sport.

Dave Samson · #54 (**permalink**) 02-05-2002, 12:23 PM

Hey Wilf,

Listen here ya pomme bastard, just in case you're wondering if we're for real, leave no doubt that you can shove that warm beer where the sun don't shine.

wilf leek · #55 (**permalink**) 02-05-2002, 03:02 PM

Bioscience says that the warmer an alcoholic drink is when ingested, the quicker it gets into the bloodstream, so who's got it right??

Anyway - aint no taste to that frozen stuff. Come over here and I'll take you for a few pints of real ale.

Wilf

ERA535 · #56 (**permalink**) 02-05-2002, 03:04 PM

Dave, Dave, Dave......!!!!!!!

Dave Samson · #57 (**permalink**) 02-05-2002, 03:07 PM

Wilf,
Looks like bioscience can't play cricket, brew good beer or produce sunshine. That's why they develop cloned sheep coz they can only fluke it right once. Just ask Jamo, he reckons his 3 daughters are too good for us, must have fluked it 3 times or subscribed for a 3-pack right up front.

wilf leek · #58 (**permalink**) 02-05-2002, 04:09 PM

Dave - suffering as I am right now from our interminable boring grey winter, I will give you the point about sunshine.
I also cannot, in all honesty, argue on the cricket front. Well I could, but I'd lose.
But - as to the beer thing, guess we were weaned on different brews, I'll make a pact - if you come here, drink ours, If I go there, I'll drink yours (well, not yours exactly, some like yours that I bought). Deal?

As to Jamo's lovely daughters, perhaps we should be more gentlemanly toward them, they seem quite well brought up despite their heritage??

ERA.0002 - The Bloomers have landed! As soon as they have passed through our rigorous decontamination procedure (we put them in the old cats bed to see if it lives or dies) we shall proceed to gain POP, then they will be winging their lovely way down under. Globetrotting gussets indeed.
BTW - you should be nore careful where you put those staples - it quite brought tears to my eyes thinking about them.

Wilf

ERA535 · #59 (**permalink**) 02-05-2002, 04:13 PM

They are actually a nice little pair, aren't they?

Dave Samson · #60 (**permalink**) 02-05-2002, 04:31 PM

Wilf,
OK I accept your offer but let's meet half-way, or nearly half-way, well let's say 90% your way. I'll be attending a mate's birthday party in Nuremburg (pomme spelling) on June 29 and we could meet early in the evening and exchange beers because I'm sure he will have drunken all my XXXX by midnight anyway but by then the beer temperature would suit you and I'll probably be taking my 5th leak (no pun intended) of the evening.
At that stage you could pose with me for a double POP pix, skull your luke warm beer and scurry back through the tunnel to your high summer heatwave.

Whatdyasay ?