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Kirkham Motorsports

 
 
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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 01-29-2004, 04:07 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Bullhead City, AZ USA, AZ
Cobra Make, Engine: too many to list
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Explanation of Different Types of Garage Floor Coverings
The type of garage floor you should use depends on how much you work on your car. With tongue firmly in cheek, here are some pointers on what garage floor you might need, from the internet, author unknown:

Plastic tiling squares -- Poseur who does no work on his car, collects Gryot's Garage catalogs (the one that explains which way to turn a nut), and is completely clueless about mechanical things; owns full set of solid gold tools stored in titanium tool boxes, but has never used them. Garage was featured in Architectural Digest.

Painted Floor -- Deluded Yuppie, obsessed with waxing and polishing; owns set of matched Falcom screwdrivers and gold plated wrenches stored in Zebrawood box and $300 plastic creeper and $5,000 hydraulic lift used to detail the inside of the wheels. On first name basis with the Snap-Off truck guy. Garage was featured in Robb Report.

Bare Concrete -- Does most of his (rarely, her) mechanical work; may rebuild engine once in a while; tools are stored in beat up tool boxes when not in use; tools are from various manufacturers including Snap-Off, CrapsMan, Procto, Mac, and others. Checks out garage sales and pawn shops on a regular basis; owns $15 wooden creeper. Has problems with rodents who enter the garage to feed on sandwiches he eats while working on the car. Recently scrounged a table saw from a garage sale, so he can build an extension onto the garage; wife allows him in the house if strips naked and bathes in GoJo first. Garage was featured in local PCA club magazine, but rejected by Pano.

Floor covering material unknown, area Hazmat team afraid to enter premises. -- Owner incessantly rebuilds both engines and transmissions; probably owns several cars but it's hard to say as over half of them are in various assortments of boxes. Tools are scattered around various piles of debris. Often makes own specialty tools and knows how to use odd bits of rock and tent stakes to substitute for factory tools. Rodents are afraid to enter the garage because of toxic odors from the floor, shelves, etc. Learning carpentry skills to build an apt. above the garage, as wife has kicked him out of the house. Garage floor was featured in Archaeological Digest.

Bill
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