Jokes

[cobra de capell]

At the Democrap convention......<p>

[cobra de capell]

[cobra de capell]

Also, a great trick to teach your dog.....

[cobra de capell]

Life Science Final Exam

The not necessarily well-prepared student sat in his life science classroom staring at a question on the final exam paper. The question directed: “Give four advantages of breast milk.” What to write? He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best:

1. No need to boil.

2. Cats can’t steal it.

3. Available whenever necessary.

So far so good - maybe. But the exam demanded a four-part answer. Again, what to write? Once more, he sighed. He frowned. He scowled and then sighed again. But suddenly, he brightened. He grabbed his pen, and triumphantly, he scribbled his definitive answer:

4. Available in attractive containers.

[Aussie Mike]

Originally Posted by cobra de capell

That pic is from the Hahn Beer comercial that shows down here in Australia. There's a series of them that are pretty funny.

Here are the adds:



another



and another one



My favourite




Cheers

[cobra de capell]

Subject: WAL-MART INTERVIEW


A manager at Wal-Mart had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening.

After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.

The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table, the interviewer asked, ‘What is the fastest hing you know of?’

The first man replied, ‘A THOUGHT.’ It just pops into your head. There’s no warning.

Asked the second man.

‘Hmmm...let me see ‘A blink! It comes and goes and you don’t know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of!

‘Excellent!’ said the interviewer. ‘The blink of an eye, that’s a very popular cliche for speed.’ He then turned to the third man, who was contemplating his reply.

‘Well, out at my dad’s ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there’s a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light on the barn comes on in less than an instant.

‘Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of’.

The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. ‘It ‘s hard to beat the speed of light,’ he said.

Turning to BUBBA, the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the same question.

Old Bubba replied, ‘After hearing the previous three answers, it’s obvious to me the at the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA.’

‘WHAT!?’ said the interviewer, stunned by the response.

‘Oh sure’, said BUBBA. ‘You see, the other day I wasn’t feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already pooped my pants.’

BUBBA is now the new greeter at a Wal-Mart near you! You probably will think of this every time you enter a Wal-Mart from now on!