Jokes

[cobra de capell]

With the Georgia Senate race heating up as a contest between Democrat Jim Martin and Republican Saxby Chambliss, ACORN has promised their full non-partisan support for Martin in the upcoming runoff election.

An anonymous ACORN spokesperson stated that according to their registration records, hundreds of thousands of voters nationwide have selected Georgia as their new home and are registered to vote in this special election. ACORN will be arranging transportation for these individuals to go to Georgia so they can participate in the election. Although not specific, they have also received absentee ballots from many thousands more who are unable to actually travel to Georgia to vote. They will be bringing these ballots with them and fully expect them to be counted, the failure of which to do so will result in court challenges.

The biggest problem facing Georgia election officials is trying to figure out how 107,291 people, currently out of state, are registered to vote in this runoff, but all claim a two bedroom, one bath trailer located 12 miles east of Dalton as their home.

Developing..

[wizard]

Originally Posted by cobra de capell

With the Georgia Senate race heating up as a contest between Democrat Jim Martin and Republican Saxby Chambliss, ACORN has promised their full non-partisan support for Martin in the upcoming runoff election.

An anonymous ACORN spokesperson stated that according to their registration records, hundreds of thousands of voters nationwide have selected Georgia as their new home and are registered to vote in this special election. ACORN will be arranging transportation for these individuals to go to Georgia so they can participate in the election. Although not specific, they have also received absentee ballots from many thousands more who are unable to actually travel to Georgia to vote. They will be bringing these ballots with them and fully expect them to be counted, the failure of which to do so will result in court challenges.

The biggest problem facing Georgia election officials is trying to figure out how 107,291 people, currently out of state, are registered to vote in this runoff, but all claim a two bedroom, one bath trailer located 12 miles east of Dalton as their home.

Developing..

Well, I live in Dalton and 12 mile East of here is Chatsworth. I have seen the trailer. It's OK. It's a 2 story.

[cobra de capell]

Originally Posted by wizard

Well, I live in Dalton and 12 mile East of here is Chatsworth. I have seen the trailer. It's OK. It's a 2 story.

Thank God you don't live in the trailer!

Anyway....

BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group
discussing why a deadline was missed or a
project failed and who was responsible.

SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager who flies in,
makes a lot of noise, craps all over everything
and then leaves.

ADMINISPHERE: The rarefied organizational
layers beginning just above the rank and file.
Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are
often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to
the problems they were designed to solve.

FLIGHT RISK: Used to describe employees who
are suspected of planning to leave the company
or department soon.

OHNO-SECOND: That minuscule fraction of time
in which realize that you've just made a BIG
mistake. Like making the selection that reformats
your hard drive.

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of
whacking the crap out of an electronic device
to get it to work again.
____

A lawyer's dog, running about unleashed, b-lines
for the local butcher shop and steals a roast off
the counter.

The butcher goes to the lawyer's office and asks,
"if a dog, running unleashed, steals a piece of
meat from my store, do I have a right to demand
payment for the meat from the dog's owner?"

"Absolutely," the lawyer responded.

The butcher immediately shot back, "Good! You
owe me $7.99 for the roast your dog stole from
me this morning."

The lawyer, without a word, writes the butcher
a check for $7.99. A few days later, the butcher,
browsing through his mail, finds an envelope
from the lawyer.

The contents read "Consultation: $25.00."