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Kirkham Motorsports

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  #81 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 09:30 AM
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My favorite....You cant make a silk purse out of a sows ear...Mom
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  #82 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 09:35 AM
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Sir, you can be ignorant, or you can be arrogant. I won't tolerate both.

It ain't home till you take the wheels off.

You're not wrong, just pushing on the pull door of reality.

A Nicholas
KPM 517
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  #83 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 09:48 AM
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Tighter than a gnat's a$$ stretched over a rain barrel
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  #84 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 10:01 AM
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Seen one, you've seen 'em both!!
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  #85 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 10:07 AM
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"Madam, I may be drunk but you're ugly, and in the morning I'll be sober"

-Churchill

"It is what it is" - everyone

Matron: “Sir, you smell.”
Dr. Johnson: “No madam, you smell, I stink.”
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  #86 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 10:16 AM
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"You know, it's so nice out, I think I'll leave it out".
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  #87 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 10:26 AM
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These are inseparable:

"The Second Amendment is in place in case the politicians ignore the others."

"Guns have only two enemies; rust and politicians."
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"If you can make black marks on a straight from the time you turn out of a corner until the braking point of the next turn, then you have enough HORSEPOWER." Mark Donohue
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  #88 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 11:11 AM
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"cheap is Good and ford wants the best" By a ford truck mechanic.
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  #89 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 11:31 AM
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Said the blonde to the police officer,

"But sir, I heard you didn't give pretty girls tickets? We don't maam, Please sign here!"

Larry
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  #90 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 11:46 AM
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My life credo " It seemed like a good idea at the time"

Told to me by a union negotiator "Non-ligitimus non-carborundum", Latin for "don't let the b#st#rds grind you down"
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  #91 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 11:59 AM
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Drive it like you stole it.
Even a blind squirrel finds an acorn once in a while
This ain't my first rodeo
Eager beats pretty any day


From my Dad's collection:

It's invenerial
My Favorite>> Thanks Dad>>>
Never pass a urinal, never trust a fart, never waste an erection.
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  #92 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 12:11 PM
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Default These may be regional

That looks worse than hammered dog sh*t!

I've been to two World's Fairs and a goat f***ing, but I ain't never seen nothing like this.
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  #93 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 12:24 PM
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Show me the money!
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'Liberals are maggots upon the life of this planet and need to get off at the next rotation.' (Jamo 2008)
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  #94 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 12:28 PM
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"I roped goats twice in towns you've never heard of son."

"fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life."

"The early bird may get the worm... but the second mouse gets the cheese."

"The difficult part is to figure out who's drunk and who's just stupid"

"Money don't DO ugly"
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  #95 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 01:21 PM
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Default from "Dirty Mary and Crazy Larry"

after crashing his car the cop radios in... "I'm unable to continue pursuit because...... my brakes went out... and ....uuuh......my steering was loose anyway."

after young cop gets new motor in police car, asks mechanic.. "hey what's my top end?" reply, "UNLIMITED"!!
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  #96 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 01:58 PM
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"I drink your milkshake! I drink it up!"
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  #97 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 02:38 PM
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I'll add my favorite...

What does not kill you makes you strong.
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  #98 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 02:48 PM
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"Lord give me patience...But give it to me NOW!!"
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  #99 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 02:51 PM
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This one's from my old boss, Road Race Champ Gene Felton: "I live with Fear everyday, occasionally SHE lets me go racing!" You won't believe how many responses that one gets! Thanks, Matt.
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  #100 (permalink)  
Old 02-20-2008, 03:05 PM
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Just heard this on TV last night

"Women wear make-up and perfume because they are ugly and they stink"
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