Jokes

[lamaluv]

22) Install new filter making sure to apply a thin coating of oil to gasket surface, make sure filter is full of oil.
23) Dump first quart of fresh oil in engine.
24) Remember drain plug from step11.
25) Hurry to find plug in drain pan.
26) Remember that the used oil is buried in the back yard, anong with the drain plug.
27) Drink beer.
28) Shovel out hole and sift oily mud for drain plug. Re-shovel oily dirt into hole. Wash drain plug in lawnmower gas.
29) Discover that first quart of oil is now on the floor. Throw kitty litter on oil spill.
30) Drink beer.
31)Crawl under car getting kitty litter into eyes. Wipe eyes with oily rag used to clean drain plug. Slip with stupid crescent wrench tightening drain plug and bang knuckles on frame.
32) Bang head on floorboards in reaction to step 31.
33) Begin cussing fit.
34) Throw stupid crescent wrench.
35) Cuss for additional 10 minutes because wrench hit car show trophy.
36) Beer.
37) Clean up hands and forehead and bandage as required to stop blood flow.
38) Beer.
39) Beer.
40) Dump in five quarts of fresh oil.
41) Beer.
42) Lower car from jack stands.
43) Accidently crush remaining case of oil.
44) Move car back to apply more kitty litter to fresh oil spilled during steps 23-43.
45) Beer.
46) Test drive car.
47) Get pulled over; arrested for DUI.
48) Car gets impounded.
49) Call loving wife, make bail.
50) 12 hours later get car from impound.


Money spent:
Parts $50.00
DUI $2500.00
Impound fee $75.00
Bail $1500.00
Beer $40.00
Total -- $4165.00

But you know the job was done right!