Jokes

[bliss]

Two old Jewish men are strolling down the street when they come to a Catholic church with a sign that reads, "Convert to Catholicism and get $10." One of the men stops and stares at the sign. "Abe," he says, "I'm thinking of doing it." With that, he strides purposefully into the church and comes out 20 minutes later with his head bowed. "So," asks Abe, "did you get your $10?" Murray looks up at him and asks, "Is that all you people can think about?"
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One December day we found an old straggly cat at our door. She was a sorry sight, starving, dirty, smelled terrible, skinny, and hair all matted down.

We felt sorry for her so we put her in a carrier and took her to the vet.

We didn't know what to call her so we named her "*****cat."

The vet decided to keep her for a day or so.. He said he would let us know when we could come and get her.

My husband (the complainer) said, "OK, but don't forget to wash her, she stinks.." He reminded the vet that it was his WIFE (me) that wanted the dirty cat, not him. My husband and my Vet don't see eye to eye. The vet calls my husband 'El-Cheap-O', and my husband calls the vet 'El-Charge-O'.

They love to hate each other and constantly 'snipe' at one another, with my husband getting in the last word on this particular occasion.

The next day my husband had an appointment with his doctor, who is located in the same building, next door to the vet.

The MD's waiting room and office was full of people waiting to see the doctor. A side door opened and the vet leaned in - he had obviously seen my husband arrive. He looked straight at my husband and in a loud voice said, "Your wife's pu-ssy doesn't stink any more. We washed and shaved it, and now she smells like a rose. Oh, and, by the way, I think she's pregnant. God only knows who the father is!" Then he closed the door.


Now THAT, my friends, is getting even!....