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  #1301 (permalink)  
Old 04-03-2017, 11:06 AM
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Just dropping by to say hi gents.

Tru
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  #1302 (permalink)  
Old 04-04-2017, 12:29 AM
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Hi Tru, any new books I should read?

Doug
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  #1303 (permalink)  
Old 04-04-2017, 12:31 AM
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The Great Lao-Tzu said:

"It is only when you see a mosquito landing on your testicles that you come to realize that there can be value in solving problems without using violence”.
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  #1304 (permalink)  
Old 04-04-2017, 12:50 AM
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Roflmao !:lol:
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Harrison #100
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  #1305 (permalink)  
Old 04-25-2017, 02:38 PM
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An old geezer became very bored in retirement and decided to open a medical clinic.



He put a sign up outside that said: "Dr. Geezer's clinic. Get your treatment for $500, if not cured, get back $1,000!"



Doctor "Young," who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr. Geezer's clinic.



Dr. Young: "Dr. Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me ?"



Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth."



Dr. Young: Aaagh !! -- "This is Gasoline!"



Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back. That will be $500".



Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money.



Dr. Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything."



Dr. Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."



Dr. Young: "Oh, no you don't, -- that's Gasoline!"



Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back . That will be $500."



Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.



Dr. Young: "My eyesight has become weak --- I can hardly see anything!!!!"

Dr. Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that so, here's your $1000 back." (giving him a $10 bill)



Dr. Young: "But this is only $10!"

Dr. Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500."



Moral of story -- Just because you're "Young" doesn't mean that you can outsmart an "old Geezer".



Remember: Don't make old people mad. We don't like being old in the first place, so it doesn't take much to tick us off.



ENJOY YOUR DAY !!



P.S. Written in large print for old Geezers.
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  #1306 (permalink)  
Old 04-27-2017, 02:51 PM
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Default French Blind Date

https://www.youtube.com/embed/_CwHrJt8Oz8?rel=0
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  #1307 (permalink)  
Old 05-18-2017, 12:00 AM
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GT40 coming up for sale...

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  #1308 (permalink)  
Old 05-18-2017, 12:20 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jcraigau View Post
GT40 coming up for sale...

Let me guess.
Confiscated?
Possible ATO issues?
Hmmm.
What do I win?
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  #1309 (permalink)  
Old 05-18-2017, 07:11 PM
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What gave it away? The popo uniform?
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  #1310 (permalink)  
Old 06-20-2017, 11:51 PM
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A Tennessee farmer got home after a long day of working in the fields, and was feeling mighty horny. He went to his wife and asked her if she felt like a roll in the hay.

His wife replied, “No Michael, our son will be home from school any minute now.”

“So what?” Michael replied. “We can just turn on the dishwasher and he won’t hear a peep.”

She replied, “No way Michael,” and that was that.

Michael got frustrated and decided to go take a ride on his tractor to let off some steam.

By the time their son had gotten home, the wife had changed her mind. She asked her son to go out to his father and tell him to come home and turn on the dishwasher.

The son went out and told the farmer what the mother had said.

Michael replied, “Tell your mother that it’s too late. I already did the dishes by hand!”

' pinched from facebook'
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  #1311 (permalink)  
Old 07-22-2017, 08:53 PM
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Default I'm back

After having a stroke in 2014 the Rms took my licence off me and I thought I would never drive again and as a result I sold my cobra to a fellow member of the nsw club so after 4 years of rehab I have improved so much that I can get my licence back albeit with conditions. So I will be looking at building another cobra. Does anybody have an unfinished kit or know of one. My left side is partly dodgy so something with an auto is ideal
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  #1312 (permalink)  
Old 07-22-2017, 10:27 PM
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This is fantastic news Brett
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Melbourne Australia

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  #1313 (permalink)  
Old Yesterday, 07:18 PM
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My wife and I went to the auction mart at Tralee the other week and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said,
'THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR'
My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs ......smiled and said, 'He mated 50 times last year, that's almost once a week.'
We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,
''THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR'
My wife gave me a healthy jab and said, 'WOW~~That's more than twice a week ! ...........You could learn a lot from him.'
We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in capital letters,
'THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR
'My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said,
'That's once a day ..You could REALLY learn something from this one.'
I looked at her and said,
'Go over and ask him if every time was with the same old cow.'
My condition has been upgraded from critical to stable and I should eventually make a full recovery.
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  #1314 (permalink)  
Old Today, 03:14 AM
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After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, British scientists found
traces of copper wire dating back 200 years and came to the conclusion that
their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 150 years ago.

Not to be outdone by the British, in the weeks that followed, an American
archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly after, a story
published in the New York Times: "American archaeologists, finding traces of
250-year-old copper wire, have concluded that their ancestors already had an
advanced high-tech communications network 50 years earlier than the
British".

One week later, Australia's Northern Territory Times, reported the
following:

"After digging as deep as 30 feet in his backyard in Tennant Creek, Northern
Territory, aboriginal Billi Bunji, a self-taught archaeologist, reported
that he found absolutely ****-all.
Billi has therefore concluded that 250 years ago, Australia had already
gone wireless..."

Makes me feel bloody proud to be Australian!
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