Joke of the Day...

[TL Marcel]

The Lone Ranger riding across the plains…

He rides over a small hill and – there – he sees Tonto lying on the ground, ear to the dirt.

Lone Ranger: “Tonto – what are you doing?”

T: “How! Kemo Sabe – stage coach, 4 horses, 2 black, two white, two drivers and 4 passengers, brown luggage up top…”

LR: “What? Amazing! You can hear it coming?”


T: “Nope... Just ran over me!”

[Ron61]

To bring this to the front page. It is for jokes, not fighting please.

Ron

[cobra de capell]

While stopped at a red light, a driver noticed two men digging in the grass median strip. As he watched, one man dug a hole, then the other man followed behind and filled it back up. When the light turned green, the driver, curious about the goings on, made a u-turn and parked. He watched for a while longer, then got out of his car and asked the men what they were doing. "planting trees," they said. He then asked where the trees were. They said, "the guy with the trees called in sick."
_____

A woman was having a daytime affair while her husband was at work. One rainy day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband's car pull into the driveway. "Oh my God - Hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the window. My husband's home early!"

"I can't jump out the window. It's raining out there!"

"If my husband catches us in here, he'll kill us both!" she replied.
"He's got a hot temper and a gun, so the rain is the least of your
problems!"

So the boyfriend scoots out of bed, grabs his clothes and jumps out the window!

As he ran down the street in the pouring rain, he quickly discovered he had run right into the middle of the town's annual marathon, so he started running along beside the others, about 300 of them. Being naked, with his clothes tucked under his arm, he tried to blend in as best he could. After a little while a small group of runners who had been watching him with some curiosity, jogged closer.

"Do you always run in the nude?" one asked.

"Oh yes!" he replied, gasping for air, "It feels so wonderfully free!


Another runner moved along side. "Do you always run carrying your clothes with you under your arm?"

Oh, "yes" our friend answered breathlessly. "That way I can get
Dressed right at the end of the run and get in my car to go home!"

Then a third runner cast his eyes a little lower and asked, "Do you
Always wear a condom when you run?"

"Nope...just when it's raining."